


Icy Chill of Winter

by Tarlan



Category: Silver Wolf (1999)
Genre: Character Study, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-09-26
Updated: 2006-09-26
Packaged: 2017-10-18 16:56:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/191116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarlan/pseuds/Tarlan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roy goes to a favorite ridge to think about the past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Icy Chill of Winter

Crisp snow crunched under his feet as he made his way up the slope using the thick lower branches of the trees for support. Evergreen boughs, heavy with the weight of snow, brushed against his jacket, the snow falling thickly to the ground as he passed. He breathed harder with the exertion, grimacing, for the air was cold, slicing into his lungs like a surgeon's scalpel.

When he reached the ridge, he stood still.

Warm air plumed through his open mouth with each gasp, like steam from a boiling kettle. Taking one last cutting, deep breath, he expelled hard, his racing heartbeat slowing as his eyes followed the panoramic view across the tree and snow filled valley.

Open lips curved to a grin of wonder, pleased that he had made the effort to climb to the top this day. He looked up into a cloudless azure sky, and then back down to the sharp lines of contrasting fern green and the blinding whiteness of the pristine snow. It was beautiful, and once again he truly understood why he stayed in the Northern Washington National Park when he could have moved on to an all-year-round, warmer climate long ago.

Seeing this fantastic vista laid out before him made all the politics and the ramifications of dealing with people -- visitors and residents alike -- worthwhile. It gave his job meaning, showing him exactly what he was protecting.

For a moment he stopped to reflect on all that he had given up just to be here. He thought of the pretty girl that he would have married if his love for her had measured up to the love he felt for the trees and for all the living things in the forest. Or if her love for the forest had been as great as his was.

However, she had wanted the city; had wanted him to take over his father's construction company and tear into the land, destroying the natural wonder by burying it beneath the ever-expanding suburbs of the growing cities. Unable to face her, he had left it to his brother to explain why he could not stay... and why their love had not been strong enough to survive.

Anna had found solace in his brother's arms -- marriage, family and finally divorce - and yet, though the words had remained unspoken, he had read in her eyes many times that she had wished her son had been his.

For this reason, he had made an effort to keep his distance, accepting the rebuke from his brother good-naturedly, knowing that Frank had said it only for his nephew's benefit. In truth, Frank had been grateful that Roy had immersed himself in the life he had chosen -- and had stayed away from the life he had created with Anna. He had not wanted to compete with Roy in the one competition that he could not win.

Roy frowned. That sounded so egotistical, that Anna would have walked away from Frank if he had moved back to the city and asked her to come back to him... but it did not make it any less true.

The funeral had been hard. Not only had he been burying a beloved and only brother that day but also trying to keep a past-love dead and buried too. She was still beautiful but the reason for leaving had not changed. He still wanted to live in the silence of the park, surrounded by trees and wildlife, and with no other people for miles. He wanted to spend his evenings reading National Geographic, watching over his experiments or occasionally playing old familiar melodies on the piano. In contrast, Anna still thrived within the city, loving the hustle and bustle of life on campus, and preferring to spend her evenings socializing while lively music filled the air around her.

Perhaps it was a remnant of his love for her that had made him agree to take in Jesse for a time, giving the boy a home while she sorted out her life, while also giving Jesse space to grieve for the father he had lost. It had been hard for Roy, coming face-to-face with a world he had denied for himself all those years ago when he accepted the remote ranger's station miles from the nearest town. He had been thrown back into a world of making small talk, of dealing with an individual within the sanctity of his home, but Jesse had brought as much joy as misery to his life for that short summer.

Jesse had gone now; finally able to make his peace with the mother who had seemingly deserted both him and his father, though Roy knew he had taken some of the forest away with him -- in his heart. He had left with promises to visit often but Roy would not hold him to such promises, knowing they had been made with the rashness of youth.

He shivered as he felt the first icy bite of the coming winter's chill in the cold breeze. Up in the mountains, high above the snow line, it was hard to believe that winter had not already come. But he had only to turn around and look down to see where the snow petered out in the far deeper valley behind him, revealing the remnants of autumn's colors. Yet he'd had a feeling that winter would come early this year from watching the frantic activities of the forest creatures as they foraged for food to tied them over until the Spring's thaw.

The radio crackled sharply, and he pulled the unit from his jacket.

"Evie? It's Roy... over."

"Mrs. Grainger says one of the deer has got into her garden again."

He laughed softly. "Okay, tell Mrs. Grainger I'll go check out the fences along that side again. Over and Out."

He sighed as he replaced the radio unit in his jacket, shaking his head. Perhaps it was time to take up Stewart's offer to maintain the fences along the eastern edge of Wainwright. Maybe that way he could stop the kids from making holes that were big enough for the deer to get through.

He paused in thought, taking one last look across the beautiful landscape. Then he turned away, slowly making his way back down the mountain, having reaffirmed that this was the life he loved.

THE END


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